Broken Laptops and Revived Dreams

Wow Megan, calm yourself down.

But the title is kind of true to my situation right now. This week, has been both amazing and terrible.

Before I start, I was going to write about 1984 by George Orwell today, because yes, I have finally read it. But instead, life interrupted and got in the way. I will probably write about 1984 soon though. So watch out for that, I guess.

Okay, so back to the 'broken laptops and revived dreams' situation I have going on.

I'll start with the terrible thing: On Saturday, my laptop decided to be real cool and break - mid writing a history essay. Whilst it was still usable, I didn't particularly enjoy using a laptop with a crooked screen (I mean I have bad eyesight at the best of times), so my laptop has left my arms and has traveled somewhere to be fixed. Before you start with the whole "typical teenager speech, can't live without the internet" speech, stop. I can easily connect to the internet with my phone or ipod. That isn't an issue. What is an issue is the fact I have limited opportunity to write - whether it be school essays or blogging. It's coursework and UCAS season at school, which means I have to do everything at school. I pretty much only do my essays at home because I find it easier to concentrate and focus when there is no around me (which is impossible at school). The UCAS situation is even more worrying because half the computers at school don't even load UCAS properly. So basically I'm in a never ending spiral of "what am I going to do?!"

You're probably wondering how I'm typing this. Well I'm using a tiny, tiny laptop which the rest of the world calls a Notebook. First of all, I would like to actually hurt the person who invented this machine, mainly because it is so difficult to type like a normal human being. So think of me, when you're using your normal sized keyboard. I'll be the one crying in the corner because I can't type my biology essay properly. Yeah, when you get to A Level biology you have to write essays. Essays for science, who knew?

Enough of me complaining and what not, back to the whole "revived dreams". Well, my dreams weren't revived exactly, but they seem more possible now. The dreams I'm talking about? Well it's just one dream. Or is it an ambition? Basically, next year, I want to study History and English at university. The only issue is that every university I look at wants triple A grades. Whilst I have faith in myself I may achieve this in the summer (or at least I'm sincerely hoping I do), my AS Level grade for English was a B. Yes I know that for most people this is a fantastic result, and I'm not trying to say it's a terrible grade or anything like that. However, for me, this grade was disappointing because I had aimed for an A, and I knew I could get an A. So when I realised I was only 5 marks away from an A, I was more annoyed with myself because I would have to resit the exam for five stupid marks.

I never did listen to my teachers when they said a few marks would be the difference between grades.

So thankfully, my English teacher suggested remarking the exam. Whilst this has it dangers of it being marked lower, I truly did not care because I wanted that A so badly. Probably a dangerous attitude, but I'll live with it. It took about a month for the paper to be remarked and somehow, the exam board gave me 7 more marks. SEVEN. If you've taken exams and what not, you'll understand that 7 marks is a lot. So now I have an A in English (yay), but it's actually caused me more worries. If anything I expected a few marks extra or lower (two or three, but I needed about five so I wasn't hopeful), but to give me seven suggests it wasn't marked correctly in the first place. How can we trust our grades on results day if this happens? If I had received the original result this year, I potentially wouldn't have gotten in to university.

I suppose I should just except the fact that essay marking is subjective and may potentially ruin my future.

Wow nice thought to end this blog post on, Megan.

When did I start referring to myself in third person?

I'll make this more cheerful. It's now Autumn and Autumn is great. I've already started wearing my boots and scarves.

Also, my friend Charlea writes a fab blog here and I've been loving her blog recently. She writes really intelligent posts, plus she also writes for The Indiependent (in fact she introduced me to the Indiependent really so now you HAVE to go look at her blog and follow her). Yeah, go look at Charlea's blog if you like great things.


Okay I need to go write essays and learn how to type.

Bye bye

I was a Reading Activist?

This summer I did something pretty cool. You might not think it's cool, but I do and that's why I'm writing about here, about one month later.

As you can tell by the title (if you read it) I became a Reading Activist within the month of August. But what is a Reading Activist? Why was I one? What did I do? 

Well let me tell you.

Every summer, the libraries in my county, do something called the Summer Reading Challenge that's aimed at children from the age of three to eleven. To do the reading challenge they only need to read six books, and after reading each book they receive different prizes. When they have completed the challenge they receive a certificate and a medal. What makes it so awesome is that the kids can read anything they want, from joke books to novels about pirates. The challenge also reinforces that reading is actually fun, I strongly feel that the pressure to read from school means that many people, especially children, see reading as some sort of task and burden. In fact people who tend to read for pleasure, because they generally enjoy it, tend to be mocked and teased (hey primary school peers how are you doing?). The children who joined the challenge were actually enthusiastic about reading, yes it was because they were winning prizes and what not but that's not the point here. 

From my first day - I was excited and terrified and my hair
was actually kind of decent. It rained walking to the library
and my hair was ruined. Life.

But what did I have to do with all of this? I stopped being under eleven a long time ago. I actually spent the majority of my time sat at a desk talking to different children, persuading them to join the challenge, giving out prizes, and generally have a great time talking to them. Have you ever had a conversation with a child? Much more entertaining than adult conversations. Although one child did mention she owned an axe which is worrying. I also got to wear a cool t-shirt which was extremely comfortable. As I volunteered on a Monday, I got involved with the craft sessions that were run in parallel to the Challenge. The Challenge was mythical themed so one week I would be helping colour in mermaids, and the next I would be listening to a boy telling me that his shield is better than his brother's because his has blood painted onto it. There was also a session on Fridays, unrelated to the Challenge, that featured young children singing - that was entertaining and cute.

Not only did I get to talk about books for two hours straight, I also met some really interesting people who were also volunteering alongside me. For instance, a certain individual had previously volunteered to help dig up historical graves. Fascinating yet terrifying. I had to stop myself from asking all the questions in fear that I would look a little creepy. There was also another volunteer who had been a reading activist the year before, I met her before I started and this really relieved me that this experience would not be a waste of time, especially if someone was willing to do it for a second time! 

This was my first 'official' volunteering thing outside of school, and even though I was super nervous and terrified that I would do something wrong, I had a really good time. I know the idea of sitting at a desk and talking to kids about books isn't for everyone, but I learned a lot of things and I actually feel way more confident speaking to strangers now. My previous self from a year a go would never have spoken to anyone or done anything remotely different. Although my initial motivation to apply was so that I could get experience and what not, my interview made me really excited to do take part in the challenge - or at least get others to do the challenge. Can I also mention that my interview was really fun? All the interviews I've had in the past have been extremely serious and, if I'm honest, a little dull. That kind of atmosphere makes me so nervous that I forget everything and anything. So shout out to Steve, who interviewed me, for doing a great job. I could have spent my summer doing nothing except hanging out with friends and living on the internet. But I didn't and I'm extremely glad. 

If this sounds cool to you, then you can learn more about it here

Until next time, guys. (It may be a review a book oooooooo) 

Ps. Don't forget to check out The Indiependent (it's moved to WordPress and it looks all fancy and stuff) (also I'm still reviewing Doctor Who so if you like that go look) 

PPS. My friend Sarah has tumblr now which uses to show her art - if you like cool drawings please follow her! 

PPPS. (Is this even a thing?): I'm thinking about starting another blog about my university/applying/a levels/ experience. Yes. This may happen. Look out for that! Also my YouTube because I haven't plugged enough things already. 

Eleanor and Park by Rainbow Rowell

Have you ever wanted to jump inside a book and read it forever? Or just simply rewind time and experience it for the first time again? This is what Eleanor and Park by Rainbow Rowell had me wishing when I saw the back cover staring back at me this morning.

Earlier this year, if you recall (even though I only mentioned it briefly here when I had a crisis because of internet language), I read Fangirl. Whilst I enjoyed the book, in some areas I found myself wanting to pick up something else. Maybe that's because I was uncomfortable with how much I could relate to Cath. who was so introverted that she excluded herself from everyone and never left her dorm room. It also mirrored some fears I have about university. (Thankfully I've been to university summer school since then so I know I can interact with strangers and they will respond positively towards me). Anyway, enough of my emotional state and back to the book. To quote John Green, I fell in love with this book slowly then all at once (that's how the quote goes right ? I don't know).

Initially, I was a little to reluctant to read/even want to read Eleanor and Park. But then I saw the adorable cover and the fact it was on offer in a bookshop I went in? Yeah I couldn't resist. Whilst the blurb is a little misleading - I mean late night phone calls only happen once in the whole story. Once.  Never mind the deviance of the blurb, this story is not only about falling in love but it is also about family and the different elements that can alter a family how a family interacts and behaves.

Eleanor, a girl uncomfortable in her own skin, despite her outrageous choice of clothes (which I enjoyed residing immensely), lives within what could only be called a broken home. With 4 siblings and a reckless drunk for a step father, Eleanor lives a dangerous life with little safety whilst she watches her every move in fear of being kicked out by Richie, her mums new husband. She attracts attention as soon she steps on the school bus, and not in a positive way either. This is where she meets Park, and the relationship begins.Whilst the initial awkward silences and conversations had me cringing in my chair, the two protagonists soon become friends through comic books and music.

The only thing that irritated me throughout the book, is the behaviour of Eleanor. However, it is stated throughout the book that she is rude, and not a nice person. I suppose her circumstances have lead her to behave in way that has no regard for anyone else. (As someone who is constantly worrying/interested in how other people respond to my behaviour, I struggled to relate or sympathise). Thankfully, the book is written in two-point perspective, which allows us to experience both Park's and Eleanor's response to events within the novel, especially the ending which was, if a little predictable, excellent.

After reading, I now believe it deserves the hype it has been given. Rainbow Rowell is an exceptional author and should be placed with the likes of John Green and Sarah Dessen. I also may or may not want to read other novels by her now. Yes.

Eleanor and Park can be purchased here.

Until next time, I guess.

PS. I've been writing more stuff for The Indiependent which can be found here, so go check that out!

Also new YouTube video! (You can subscribe if you like). I danced and did the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge

The Giver - Lois Lowry

There aren't many books out there that make you think about the way you live your life, but The Giver does. I'm still not sure why it's aimed at children but it is. A few weeks ago I wrote a review for The Indiependent and I'm sharing it here. Please go check out The Indiependent - it's fab. 

Many film trailers have persuaded me to invest into the books that have inspired them. It happened with Divergent by Veronica Roth, and it has now happened with The Giver by Lois Lowry. Published in 1993, it is regarded as one of the modern classics and has won the Newbery Medal, a literary award for children’s books. The dark nature of the novel, however, can easily be aimed at adults with many school libraries banning the novel, which has meant that The Giver was one of the most challenged books in the 1990’s. After reading the novel, and spending many days reeling from the ending, I can understand the controversy Lowry created, even if she did not intend for it.

The novel is set in a utopian future and follows the young protagonist Jonas as he becomes a Twelve, the year where each child receives their life long occupation. Within this utopian society, rules are accepted and obeyed without question, so when Jonas receives his position as Receiver of Memories, a position within society where he will be excluded from his family and friends, he accepts with little objection.

From here, we realise, along with Jonas that this perfect world is more darker and dystopian than first presented. It becomes apparent when Jonas is told he has The Capacity to See Beyond. Currently, within our world, this connotes psychic qualities, however within The Giver this capacity gives Jonas the ability to see colours once he is taught them. Hence we learn that through the control of the Elders, everything within the Community is equal. There are no differences -  this means there is no music, literature, colour, and no strong emotions. By taking away all the differences and choices there is a belief that this will create harmony within the population, and who is to disagree when there is no pain, starvation, illness and war to create negativity and a call for change?

On his first day, Jonas meets The Giver, the current Receiver of Memories who will pass on the memories, from all of time, onto Jonas. The Giver, a kind elderly man who has lived his life secluded due to the vast amount of memories he is forced keep, is initially is cautious to share memories of wars and conflict with Jonas because of the failure The Giver experienced ten years previous with Rosemary, a young girl who could not cope with the pain from the memories, so chose to leave the Community and be released. A novel of this genre fails to have much purpose if someone doesn’t attempt to bring change. So, with the memories shared by The Giver and Rosemary’s legacy, Jonas and his mentor are motivated to try and bring about change within their community that seems so perfect on the surface.

Externally, this tale may seem like straight forward science-fiction, however it is so much deeper than that. It’s about the importance of love, the danger of control and ultimately deciding whether the truth is good for the people – something we can definitely relate to, with the increased availability of information due to the internet,  it can be very easy to release issues hidden from the public. This novel may be aimed at children, however the topic at hand deserves a level of maturity and understanding that many children won’t reach until teenage years. The Giver successfully demonstrates the thin line between utopia and dystopia, and illustrates the importance of knowledge and how dangerous a lack of information can be on the human curiosity and nature. 

“If one cannot enjoy reading a book over and over again, there is no use in reading it at all.” ― Oscar Wilde

I have used a quote which I found a few months ago to title this post. Much to the surprise of everyone around me, I can read a book multiple times without getting bored. I will never understand why this is shocking, but then again, I don't understand people who can only read a book once and never have the urge to read it again. This isn't the purpose of this post - I just wanted to share this quote with you. Maybe in the future I will create a post full of my favourite quotes. Who knows. 

Now for the actual topic at hand.

Sometimes, you read something, whether it be poetry or a novel or an intriguing newspaper article and it changes your approach to life or just makes you think. A lot. This may last a whole lifetime or just a few minutes. 

I'll have another book review here soon, but for now, I present to you a a list of stuff that have left my brain whirling and my outlook on life tarnished. You may want to read them. I highly suggest you do.  

• Torn by Cat Clarke (Actually make that any Cat Clarke novel. Remember the post I wrote about her  few months ago?)
• Some Girls Are by Courtney Summers
• Paper Towns by John Green
• A Smile To Remember by Charles Bukowski
• How I Live Now by Meg Rosoff
• Catcher In The Rye - J D Salinger 
• Slated by Teri Terry
• The Giver by Lois Lowry 
• Before You Were Mine by Carol Ann Duffy 

Also, please check out my author profile on The Indiependent here and maybe any other social networks that appear on the right hand side of this blog? That would be fab.

Okay goodbye, I will now go into my corner and panic about results day that is in about 42 hours. Not that I'm counting or anything. Ha ha ha.

Exciting Things!

It's August! Finally!

But why is August so exciting? Well curious human I will tell you.

If like me, you enjoy the BBC series Doctor Who more than is acceptable then you'll realise that Doctor Who is returning on the 23rd August. It is finally August. Doctor Who is about to return in three weeks and I could not be more excited. Honestly, along side that elation lies feelings of worry and nervousness, especially with the recent interviews and quotes that say Who is 'different'.

Not that I hate change but I hate change.

I have all faith that Capaldi will be a great Doctor, but there is always the option that, for me, the difference will cause me to dislike the programme I have love since I was 7.Ten years. Wow.

But, just the like the Doctor, the show must regenerate to prevent it's death. It's one of the main reasons the show has lasted for half a century.

Will I be going to the Cinema to watch the first episode though? I hope so. (I didn't go to the cinema for the 50th due to my failed eyes that prevent me from seeing 3D films in, well, 3D.)

Anyway, that is not the only exciting thing that is happening.



Yesterday, it was announced via twitter, that the entertainment blog, The Indiependent (in no way affiliated with the British newspaper The Independent), had added new writers. One of these writers was me. Yes.





Obviously, I am very excited and honoured to not only be writing for them, but to have been given this opportunity in the first place. Actually, I spent a huge amount of time reading the blog before getting the courage to send an email and apply (No one tell them I want to remain cool and aloof (jokes))

But what is The Indiependent? The Indiependent is a platform for aspiring writers, such as myself, to gain journalist experience. It is features reviews from music to films to books. Not only that, but the writing is actually entertaining and informative. Somehow, I am now affiliated with this bunch of talented individuals.

What will I be writing? Well, reviews (The first review may or may not be about A Great Big Worlds album Is Anybody Out There? You'll have to follow The Indiependent to find out). One thing, I am very excited about, is when Doctor Who returns on the 23rd (bringing it back to the beginning - look at that for writing technique), I will hopefully be posting weekly reviews of each episode on The Indiependent.

I hope, at least, some of you, are excited for the things about to happen and will check out The Indiependent.

Bye :)

That One Time I Visited Lincoln

I don't know if I've said this before, but I quite enjoy taking photographs. Hence, when I took a trip to Lincoln a few weeks ago, I also too my camera. Lincoln is possibly the cutest city I have ever had the pleasure to visit, so naturally I couldn't resist but to take a lot of photographs. Whilst there, we visited the Cathedral and attempted to visit the Castle (apparently two seventeen year old's are too young to walk around a historical building without an adult). Anyway, here are some of the photographs I took, enjoy!